Open letter to the owner of the wierd hair I found this morning

While drafting this letter in my head, I played out both sides of the problem because I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you had nothing but good intentions in leaving one of your hairs behind on the toilet seat for me to find today. **notice i said hairs behind, not behind hairs as I try not to make these assumptions**

Pro:
1) The presence of the left behind hair reminds us all, "hey, this seat is nasty-dirty and only cleaned once daily (and who knows if they actually clean the toilet seat, i think they just lift it up and clean the bowl) and given that there are only 3 toilets in the ladies restrooms and 30+ women who use them (as well as the ladies from the next building who come over to OUR building...im guessing because they have some stank business to take care of) and given that the average woman probably uses the ladies room 3x/day thats an average of 30x/day that someone sits on this here throne. yeah...do yourself a favor and utilize the ridiculously thin seat liner...or better yet, go to the next hair-free stall."

Con:
1) The presence of the left behind hair reminds us all just how nasty some "ladies" can be and makes us crazy by trying to catch the "Rapunzel Rapunzel let down your hair" culprit therefore verifying the size and style of shoe seen in the next stall and lingering just a bit longer while washing the hands so that you can then run back to said stall and check the seat for reminents.

I've come to the conclusion that while I appreciate any attempt that your Rapunzel donation made at the "pro" argument listed above, I've decided that your lost and found object is, indeed a con as it's making me mad crazy and induced a new super sleuth challenge for which I simply don't have time to investigate.

So, in the future, although I'm sure you had the best intentions when envoking your Rapunzel habits...I must insist that you follow appropriate airline regulations and "Please check under your seat and in the overhead cabin to insure you have all of your belongs as you depart the aircraft. We thank you so much for flying with us today. We know you have a choice when you fly and no one loves you, or your money, like us!"

Sincerely,
MC